


Call My Name, Hold My Heart

by Reeeading



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Heavy Angst, M/M, Soft Xu Ming Hao | The8
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-05
Updated: 2020-01-05
Packaged: 2021-02-27 11:02:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,736
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22126042
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Reeeading/pseuds/Reeeading
Summary: Junhui was ain’t no wonderer; a realist even if he should say. But when circumstances hit and things didn’t go as he wanted them to be, Junhui more often than not assured himself thatwonderingwas in fact not a crime.Buried deep under the corner of his bed, was a book covered in dust; a book of Junhui’s listed ‘In another universe’s which had always been too heavy to be brought to light. But if there was one day Junhui should be honest, he would say; rather than the wonders, it was a book too heavy of his employer’s name — Of Xu Minghao’s name;.His goddamn target.
Relationships: Wen Jun Hui | Jun/Xu Ming Hao | The8
Comments: 2
Kudos: 20





	Call My Name, Hold My Heart

_Dark;_

it was dark the first time Minghao knew Junhui’s name.

The snow was falling and cold breeze was blowing. The moon was shining bright with no stars accompanying it through its solitude night.

Minghao was already bundled in his nightwear while Junhui was still clad in his complete suit; a gun sat in his hand.

Minghao wasn’t terrified. He didn’t stay away nor flinch. Instead, he tested Junhui’s name on his tongue.

Junhui became the one flinching.

With a voice barely out to be registered, Minghao whispered, “So, Wen Junhui it is, huh?” A short bitter laugh completed his question, dangling by the edge of his chapped lips. His cheeks started to redden from the cold.

In another universe, Junhui thought he wouldn’t waste a breath answering his question. He would turn around and gave the younger a smile; showing his pearl-white teeth before shortening their distance.

He would stride across the street toward the younger; long legs taking big steps each time. He would open his hands, stretch his fingers, and encompass the younger’s face with his two palms; monopolizing those two big round eyes that would stare at him in exchange.

Galaxies were trapped in those eyes; stars dancing in confusion. Pinkish blush blossomed on Minghao’s face which immediately reminded Junhui to the pinkish sky of the beautiful sunset Minghao had always loved to talk about.

A beach, a house, a dog, and a loving partner to share the beautiful sight with; the kind of dream Minghao had always held closely to his heart. Junhui more often than not prayed he was given place in that dream. 

He would take all the time he was given to study Minghao’s face; to burn it and engrave it to the very back of his head, to hope and be able to carry its picture in his heart wherever places he would be destined to go – every thin hair, every mole; _everything_.

_Beautiful._

He kissed him.

In that other universe, Minghao would kiss him back and Junhui could openly tell the world his hobby. He kissed and kissed and kissed; leaving no edges, no curves, no place left untraced and untouched. He would praise Minghao’s body like it was some kind of sacred shrine he’d put his deepest faith in.

But in this universe, Junhui only clenched his jaw. No words were spoken as he bit back whatever words his rash tongue could have possibly rolled out. His long legs set straight on their rightful positions like some flagpoles. His knees weren’t wobbling and his eyes continued on concentrating only on one man; as if he was boring holes on the said man. Gun was intact in his hold.

Minghao just shrugged his shoulders and dismissed their talk; as if it was holding no significance to him.

He brought up his hands instead; one, to tighten his grip over his robe and the other one, to play with the falling snows. He caught them and twirled them around his fingers. Eyes were on them, a small smile was on his face; he said, “They’re beautiful; our first snow together, Joshu – no, I mean _Jun_.”

In another universe, Junhui thought he wouldn’t have wasted a breath pulling Minghao to himself. He would pull the younger to his chest and keep him safe there. His heartbeat would tap softly against the younger’s back, knocking the same way he had always been knocking on the younger’s door to wake him up on every start of the day: I am here to serve you, please wake up and entertain my wish.

His hands then would be resting on Minghao’s hip, chin propped on his shoulders. He’d take all the scent the youngers had like it’s some kind of oxygen that would keep him alive and breathing. He would smile and huff, admiring the snow with the younger swaying from side to side in his arms.

Their hands overlapped.

In that other universe, Minghao would be smiling too, huffing a breath as if he’s exhaling prayers of gratitude for the beautiful snow perfecting their movie-like life. His eyes were glimmering with every piece of snowflakes he witnessed dancing. He would press farther into Junhui’s chest.

The latter welcomed him to do as pleased.

But in this universe, Junhui only gritted his teeth. He pushed his hand farther forward; gun’s barrel an inch closer to Minghao’s head, a moment closer to blow his head off.

Yet, Minghao didn’t stir; he stared, instead.

In another universe, Junhui often imagined he would point the same gun on Minghao. But, instead of real bullets, it would spurt out water and giggles. Junhui imagined, the sky would be blue; clouds hanging like pack of sheep – crowding the same space; feeding on the same turf. The Sun hang like the halo of an angel, the angel’s song filled the world.

The song, Junhui thought, oddly sounded similar to the younger’s giggles.

Minghao, so carefreely and full of life, ran from one place to another; smiling in glee, his cheeks were full and red from too much laughing.

Junhui would run after him with a boy he couldn’t quite place the face of in his arm while Minghao stood on top of the hill; waiting patiently and beautifully for them to reach and pick him up. Junhui climbed and claimed him the same moment his feet reached the same height with Minghao’s own.

He kissed him like he was showing the world how to stake a claim: Minghao was his.

He thrusted his tongue; searching for Minghao’s tongue and hooked them together. Their saliva mixed till they could no longer identify which was whose.

Their tongues intertwined like they forgot how to part, like it tried to be one and get tied. Their hands were covering the unknown boy’s eyes.

In that other universe, sparks boomed like fireworks. Their lips sealed together like they were affirming promises. The wind was blowing and birds one by one came and went by. Their lips remained attached under the beautiful sky.

_I love you_ : it said. _I adore you_ : it vouched. _Do stay_ : it begged for a promise.

But in this universe, the barrels turned and clinked, there were real bullets and Junhui’s fingers were sitting on the trigger. Junhui twitched his brows and asked, “Any last words, Xu?”

“No,” Minghao answered; brief and curt

In another universe, Junhui liked to imagine; Minghao would have so much to share with him. From his lunch to the hole he discovered in his favorite pair of socks, Minghao would tell him every single fragment of his day and Junhui would listen.

Their limbs were tangling together, a blanket covering them as if their doing was not a thing to be shared of.

Junhui would be basked in a warmth not from the pile of the sheets but from the weight of a skin on his chest instead.

Minghao’s hand would be carving a tattoo just right above his heart; _mine_ , it would read.

Junhui just let him be, or rather encouraged him; he pushed fringes away from Minghao’s face.

The younger then reached up and stole kisses from his chin; the soft fabric of his sweater grazed Junhui’s cold chest as he did.

Junhui shivered.

In that other universe, Junhui smiled like he was succumbing in front of the other; palms were opened as if he was offering himself: _here take me_ ; it said.

He then kissed Minghao soft and sloppy; honey on his lips, candy on his tongue. Sunrise and birdsongs as his promise.

But in this universe, Junhui only gritted his teeth at the lack of fear and words from Minghao. Growing irked with every second that was passing by; wanted nothing but to scrape that thick, grey skin off and hunted down whatever secret it was burying deep underneath it.

Yet, Junhui could never broke the younger the way he did codes.

Now, Minghao was looking at him; _staring_ , even. Gaze was unwavering as if it was meaning to convey something his lips couldn’t.

Junhui, from his place, deciphered it as ‘ _Do me’._ His grip tightened.

In another universe, Junhui thought he would respond to such command without second thought; jumping right away into the scene and fucked him senseless. Minghao would come for him, scream his name so loud and glow beautifully as he sank back to bed underneath him just for him to witness; sweat glistening with a smile adorning his face so bright it could easily be mistaken with the sun.

Junhui liked to imagine Minghao to be very soft – pliant. The type who would sleep peacefully with mouth parted for air after sex, the type who loved to snuggle and knew nothing called ‘space’. Because in the end, whatever was Junhui’s; was also Minghao’s – Just like how he was Minghao’s and Minghao was his. _Shared._ Everything was shared; there was no such thing as ‘personal own’.

They would lie on their bed. The house was theirs, the room was theirs, the furniture was theirs; everything was _theirs_. They owned them together – _shared,_ including _their future_. 

But in this universe, Junhui pulled the trigger.

Red bloomed on Minghao’s chest; spreading fast on his silk wear. Minghao tumbled backward before his feet failed him; the gravity grasped him and he slipped – out of the roof top; out of Junhui’s sight. Junhui only gritted his teeth.

In another universe, Junhui liked to imagine he would be Junhui and Minghao would be Minghao.

They would be set free and Junhui would wake up to Minghao every single day. Happiness, sadness, anger; the world would be painted vibrantly. Red for passion, green for peace, blue for comfort. Everything was drawn as it was; no gray, no beating around the bush. Junhui could read Minghao like he did newspapers.

Minghao could laugh in glee and Junhui would never get bored of hearing it even after countless time. They would jump, they would dance, they would _date_ ; simply because they were alive.

But in this universe, Junhui jumped.

His stretched out his hand; yanked up Minghao’s body and pulled him to his chest. Their bodies collided. Harsh wind scraped their skin, their holds on each other were tightening. Minghao’s touch hurt more than the wind’s; it burnt. Yet, Junhui didn’t want to let go. He closed his eyes.

In another universe, they _lived_ together.

But in this universe, they _died_ together.

**.**

**.**

**.**

_They crashed._

**Author's Note:**

> A new angst in the house! Hope you guys like it :D  
> Though it is late, I just want to tell you, guys; HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! May 2020 be good to y'all and also to our boys, Seventeen! <33 Time is passing so fast, I can't believe it's been 8 months since I first joined AO3, even more so that I've been knowing and stanning our boys for a year already! Time really did fly TTwTT
> 
> Again, I hope y'all will continue on accompanying me in this writing journey of mine. I'll be as always waiting to hear from y'all in the comment section bellow. I'll be more than happy to know your thoughts or prompts you'd like me to write and also, I'll try to update more often. Hope you guys will wait for me. 
> 
> Last but not least, thank you so much for all your supports and comments. They have always been what makes my day! 
> 
> I love you, guys and thank you so much <3333
> 
> \-- Reeeading
> 
> PS: additional notes you might want to know  
> 1\. Jun was an assassin. He was tasked to kill Minghao, an heir to a big corporation.  
> 2\. Not important, but Minghao was those characters in dramas who was pictured as someone with bright future but sadly had a weak and sickly body.  
> 3\. Jun came to Minghao's place as his personal assistant named Joshua to execute his task. Thus why Minghao didn't know his name.  
> 4\. If there is still some missing links, do feel free to ask me in the comment bellow. I'll respond as fast as I could :D


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